Every morning I spend hours with Him. Every morning I feel so complete. But by the afternoon, I am depleted, tired. And today by day’s end, I felt very very alone. The impossible, Lord, is for some one else. The dreams are for some one else. I am tired. I am too tired.
Night came.
Dusk hovered.
Darkness slipped across the horizon silently.
I closed my eyes to invite the darkness in,
Aloneness breathed heavily,
Squeezing life from my lungs and my heart,
I wanted to sleep,
To end the day, and not start another one.
Because another day would begin with Him, and I didn’t want to be in His presence. I felt dirty, soiled, ugly, fat, alone…the first time in months.
Who are You talking to when You say ‘all things are possible with God? Me? That may sound true in the wee hours of the morning when You and I are alone together, but in the midst of the ‘real’ world? Not hardly! Dreams are for kids. And I am old.
